Becoming Strong.

mood: humble
day: tough

Today was different. That's really the only way I can put it. School was normal except that last night I was thinking of how I cuss alot...and i REALLY need to stop. I dont do it to get attention, I'm not sure why I do it, I guess I feel like some of those words are the only ones that fit or something and so I use them. But I really really really need to work on that. So I was thinking about that this morning, but other than that school was normal until huddle.

So at huddle a lady name Lynda came and talked to us.
a little background about Lynda, she was/is Kerri's best friend so that is very important to me to know that we have a connection through Kerri already. And if you dont know Kerri was one of my very very dear friends that died of melanoma about 2 years ago.
But Lynda came and talked to the senior huddle tonight. She talked about how we need to go out and find someone to bring to christ and to be a "wet buger" as she refered to it as, but we really need to stick to God and rely on him and pray, pray, pray.
She told 3 impacting stories that all had to do w/ the greatest commands, and she brought it together by reading them. It was really powerful. I kind of started tearing up right there on the spot b/c she had been asking for prayers and got some emails back and she read on from Kerri's mother, Mayrolyn. That was really touching to me b/c I know her and Kerri's 2 precious girls, Carlee and Jolee.
But on the way home I just couldn't get this terrible feeling out. I didnt know what to do, so I start tearing up, all the while listening to Casting Crowns. So I'm driving and crying. Trying to figure out what God is trying to tell me. And the song "Love Them Like Jesus" come on. So I begin to sing along and I'm thinking to myself, this is EXACTLY what I need to be doing. so many times in school you get sucked into the "usual" and you do things that you would NEVER do and you gossip and you cuss, and you ignore what God is trying to lay out in front of you. So the song is playing and I'm trying to sing along and I just stop singing and start bawling. Tears are streaming down my face..and im thinking how can I be different, how can I make a difference. And it hit me, when a person comes to me w/ a problem or a praise, I need to pray w/ them right there. I don't need to wait and put on the weekly prayer list, I need to be w/ them and pray w/ them right then and there. w/ the motherly gene I have instilled w/in me I need to be open to everyone and I need to love everyone like Jesus. I need to strive the christian girl I portray myself to be and I need to pray, w/o ceasing. When I got home I opened my bible and I opened to Psalm 37 and Joshua 1:9. those verses are so powerful for everything in my daily life. They have impacted my life so much. So from this day forward I want to strive to be a example in the fact that I want to pray w/ you when your going through that needs prayer. I want the WANT to be there for you and pray for you. And I also want to be more like Jesus, to beome stonger.


Love Them Like Jesus lyrics
The love of her life is drifting away
They're losing the fight for another day
The life that she's known is falling apart
A fatherless home, a child's broken heart

You're holding her hand, you're straining for words
You trying to make - sense of it all
She's desperate for hope, darkness clouding her view
She's looking to you

Just love her like Jesus, carry her to Him
His yoke is easy, His burden is light
You don't need the answers to all of life's questions
Just know that He loves her and stay by her side
Love her like Jesus
Love her like Jesus

The gifts lie in wait, in a room painted blue
Little blessing from Heaven would be there soon
Hope fades in the night, blue skies turn to gray
As the little one slips away

You're holding her hand, you're straining for words
You're trying to make sense of it all
They're desperate for hope, darkness clouding their view
They're looking to you

Just love them like Jesus, carry them to Him
His yoke is easy, His burden is light
You don't need the answers to all of life's questions
Just know that He loves them and stay by their side
Love them like Jesus

Lord of all creation holds our lives in His hands
The God of all the nations holds our lives in His hands
The Rock of our salvation holds our lives in His hands
He cares for them just as He cares for you

So love them like Jesus, love them like Jesus
You don't need the answers to all of life's questions
Just know that He loves them and stay by their side
Love them like Jesus
Love them like Jesus

So thats about it for now, I hope you have an amazing week. God bless.

OH...my govnt class...

mood: ummm....eh..
good day/bad day: it was alright...

So today in Govnt today we had a very BIG discussion on abortion and the death penalty, but thats not all so let me explain...(these are my veiws and opinoins so im sorry if i offend anyone...but this is "my spot" so i guess i have the first amendment right?)

Since Govnt started this year all we've talked about is Liberal and Conservative. We've been talking big issues that are involved in deciding whether your a liberal or conservative...
the main issuse that we've gone over so far are: Censorship, environment protection/big buisenss, perosonal/govnt decision, legalizing weed, gay marriage, Palligame, gay adoption, trans. gendered children, gambling, military, gun control, abortion, and the death penalty.

lots to cover in three days huh...

so i 've been pretty nuetral on alot of that...well not nuetral, but mostly conservative..but not strong about any of it...not enough to argue at least. but the big arguement that i have is...on the liberal side your pro-choice, but against the death penalty...WHY WOULD YOU KILL AN INNOCENT BABY AND LET A KILLER GO!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!? that blows my mind...why would you do that??? that makes absolutly no sense to me!! our teacher tried to argue that there are "rehab" opportunities for the killers/theifs/pedafiles...but only like 8% of them actually want to change and get a second chance. so why then would you still want killers on the loose and sex offenders out there??? obviously im VERY conservative on this issue...cons. believe in pro-life and are for the death penalty. but in alitte bit if-ish about the death penalty...b/c if they dont want to change then i dont see why you let them back out into the world...but if they do want to change, and they actually do, then fine, but they have to be closely watched. but im still very conservative about this. i believe that if you have an abortion then the woman who makes that choice is KILLING her child. no matter whether she was raped or she just got knocked up, i believe she is killing her child. now whether or not she wants to keep it is another story. but if your willing to put yourself in danger of getting some nasty and crazy disease from having all sorts of chemicals put into your body to get rid of the baby, then why not just have the baby and have the reassurance the you will be fine and just give the baby up for adoption. ok...ill get off the soap box, but i just wanted to write that to let you all know where i stand on this issue....b/c clearly its up and coming and getting to be a big deal. anywho...i hope you all now have something to think about and i hope you have an AWESOME day!!! PEACE!!

FOOTBALL FRIDAYS!!

mood: tired, but excited at the same time...weird

good day/bad day: FREAKING AWESOME DAY!!!

QUOTES-

"Oh my gosh, i think im about to laugh!!"

"It's better to fun size it than not at all!!"

so today was pretty much the awesomest day EVER! so i woke up this morning, kinda groggy actually but good for the most part and i got ready and i went to school....

band was good and so were all the rest of my classes...

but in fourth period i found out that i got voted president of community problem solving...which may sound really really corny, but its really challenging...its crazy but im really excited about that....

the pep rally went well and some people were more enthusiastic about it this time, but not too many....but me and jess did good at announcing and all that good stuff....

so we finish up the pep rally and then our last period is athletics....and we had to run an 800, which is one full lap around the school...its was freaking hard but i ran it in a 2:45...so i was really excited. for being fat and out of shape i did pretty good.

so here is the most exciting part...i got home and my mom had gotten the mail for us and just laid it on the table....i was just looking through when i see this big cream colored envelop addressed to me from ACU...and i was like what is this..hmmm...

and i opened it and it was my ACCEPTANCE LETTER TO ACU!!!! WHHOOOOOO HOOOOOO!!! im pumped! so excited...now i dont have to worry about getting into college...haha

so at the game tonight...we had ALOT of fun...omg...it was so fun! if you want to see pics then you can check out my facebook! but tonight i ran the spirit flag and danced around like an idiot and had SOOO much fun....

everyone was talking to me like they all knew me....its was really funny....b/c i didnt know people actually liked me...HAHA! but i guess they do....hehe

well we did lose to the steers....but it was a really good game....it was 0-0 in the first 3 quarters, and in the last quarter they scored twice, but it was good, we held them off as long as we could. and plus graham is where Colt McCoy's little brother plays football, and thats where he is from so you gotta give us some slack!

but the game was good over all and i cant wait for the next one! well good night everyone!!

PEACE!!

GO FRIDAY NIGHT!!!

mood: perdy good...
good day/bad day: hmm...

football....hmm...friday....it all fits...
so today me and vic (my friend that is going to run the spirit flags w/) made jerk shirts!! whoo hoo!!! im so excited about tomorrow! our first home game....as a senior! im pumped...totally pumped! so ill have to post a picture of us tomorrow...we're going to be so awesome! our shirts rock my face off and we painted bandana's and they're awesome too!!

today we registered for our college classes...that was loades of fun! i've never taken so much money to school w/ me in all my life....it was crazy! and i also had to pay for our senior girls football shirts we ordered and i had a PALS fee i had to pay...so i just basically sucked all the money out of my mom...wow....so much...

wow im so tired...i bet none of this makes sense...haha...k im going to take a nap...peace out and have an awesome evening...TOOTLES!!

you know its going to be a good day when...

mood: ambitious

good day/ bad day: AWESOME DAY!!!

So i woke up this morning, the usual...6 a.m. and i go jogging. it was beautiful out. though it was still dark, it was very very lightly misting and cool and just amazing. i could have jogged all day like that. and i always put my iPod on shuffle when i jog...but this morning it pick Spice Girls....really random, but it put my at a REALLY good jogging pace...so that was good.

so i get back to the house and get ready for school. (sammi stayed the night by the way) so me and her decided last night that we wanted to dress up and be cute today, so we did...and yes i think we were freaking cute!! anywho, i get to school and i swear today was like the ideal school day for any teen...it was a dream...it was soooo good!! So band is first and i walk in and we're staying inside today (which is always a good thing b/c i dont like carrying my drum ALL the way down to the parking lot we practice on..grr..) anywho...so we're just running through our music and we got out early so we had some time just to chill and hang out...so that was good...then i got to biology, which is supposed to be my hardest class...but we get there and he just rambled about the assignment that we had last friday, and we didnt do any work or have homework, and that is ALWAYS a plus....

SOOO....today is tuesday, which means its english today during 3 and 4 period. and you ALWAYS know it a good thing when your professer walks in with a BIG whataburger bag full of breakfast burritos....OMG! we were all pumped! so our english professor bought us breakfast and let us eat and then we started reading "Beowulf"...which is easy b/c its just reading and we only had like a page of reading for homework...but we dont have that class till thursday so we have 2 days....so that was def my best period....

then in my 5th period...which is PALS and i just sat there and listened to my iPod and read my book, b/c we never do anything in there anyway...so that was relaxing. then i went to luch...which its always good to eat...so i did.

6 and 7 are my blow off classes so i dont do anything in there anyway so i didnt do anything in there today either...whoopy..

but when i got to athletics, we were doing our regular stretches and warm ups and one of the coaches came up to me and one of my really good friends kenli and asked us to pick out the new track uniforms they're getting for us this year...i was like YEAH!!!! duh....so i didnt have to go work out and we picked the most AWESOME uniforms EVER!!! im so pumped ...i cant wait to wear them!! AHHHH!! so excited!

after school was out i had a community problem sloving meeting...and that was cool...mainly just sat and talked...it was cool...then i can home and it randomly started poring rain and now im sitting here eating grapes! so it's been an AWESOME day! whoo hoo! anywho...i've got to go finish the rest of my day...tootles!! PEACE!

Tough Times....

Mood: mmm...not a good one...but not a crappy one either
good day/bad day: a'ight...

So today i woke up at like 9 and got ready to go bail hay...well actually we were putting tons of hay under a huge pumpkin patch....but its still hard labor and i got dirty. anywho, so i did that this morning...all the while talking to drew about love...and that was a heck of a great conversation....i loved it!! but then we went to whataburger and chilled for awhile and ate french fries and talked. after that i went to sammi's and picked out what we were going to wear tomorrow...mostly b/c both of us want to dress up so its more of a big deal...anywho...
when we got back, she was on the computer and i was just laying on the couch just chillin...i was almost asleep...when justin called me...grrr.
i was laying there thinking what the heck he would want to come over for...he sounded kind of upset but i dont ask questions....so i didnt...but when he got here...he handed me a big shoe box and a large picture album i had given him awhile back when we were dating....all he said to me was.."i was going to throw this away, but i decided to give it all to you and i knew laynette would go through it if i kept it" and he gave me a hug and left. i stood there for a few seconds and went back inside....at first i was like what am i going to do w/ all this...but then it sunk in that he just gave me back everything i had basically given him. HOW FREAKING RUDE! i know i dont have any feelings for him or anything, but it hurts so much to know that someone you cared for so much at one time just basically wiped you out. and i know i kinda did that to him...but he did not have to give all of that back to me. i cried....and i haven't cried in quite a long time, until today...and of course it has to be b/c of him....GGGGRRRRRRRRRR!! anywho....thats the gist of my day...it really sucked actually but brownies and good company is always a good thing to have around when crap happens....
anywho i hope everyone that reads this has a lot better day than me....PEACE OUT!!!

Random thoughts....

mood: merrr....
good day/bad day: ehh...

So today was sunday.
church was really good this morning. i want to the nursery and kept my precious babies...and put the sweetest baby girl to sleep for like 30 min....i was so excited!! and this afternoon after eating delicious lunch i took a nap..and almost over slept..but thank gooness for mommies!! then i went to lifeteam...which is the best place in the world to be!! there were so many ppl there tonight! we had a full house! but it was sooo good. we talked about Heaven and heaven...if that makes sense. but anywho...the food and the fellowship was good as always and talking the LORDS supper was great as well.

So during lifeteam we were talking abour Heaven and we went through specific verses and just basically threw out our views of Heaven and heaven. i cant write exactly what all we discussed b/c no one really knows what is to come. but key points that stuck out to me was that in the Bible it says that we will all go TOGETHER...that just amazes me...i like that thought...and the fact that God ill wipe away EVERY tear. that just makes me so joyous b/c i have had SOOO many tears...its such a good feeling when someone is there to wipe away your tears and tell you they love and that its all going to be ok....but there is no better thought than knowing that God himself will do that for you someday. mmmm...good feeling.

after our discussion we ate supper....mmm mmm...it was sooo good. just sitting and talking and eat awesome food...the discussion i was involved in was w/ drew, jerimiah, t, stacie, and some new guy named travis....and it went from strange physological diseases to everything that is wrong w/ all the starwars and lord of the rings movies to college classes to male gay underwear stores that drew never ment to go into...(long funny story...haha). but it was really good and funny....then when we got everyone back into the den we had the LORDS supper and prayed. it was really good. just to sit and share such a special thing w/ my big ol' family...the body of christ. mmm....another good feeling. and of course having ethan in the middle of it all asking for more of the bread of Jesus and saying that he's going to ride the tractor....once again another good feeling. so much love and care for one another in one safe place. i love it!!!

So tomorrow we dont have school...but i still have to get up early and bail hay....yippy. but i guess it will be fun anyhow...but i think this week will be good. my first biology assignment is due tuesday...but i already finished it...so i feel on top of things. so im ready for anything....i think. anywho....not much more to say to be honest. kinda boring right now. hope you all have an awesome week and night!!! PEACE OUT!!!

Slow Fade

So i'm a BIG casting crowns fan...and i got the new CD..The Alter and The Door....and #3 is an amazing song! oh my gracious...its SOO good...its basically talking about how everything just slowly fades...but i guess you can find out for yourself when you listen to the song...but here are the lyrics....so just read this and keep your mind open....

Be careful little eyes what you see
It's the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings
Be careful litte feet where you go
For it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have truned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It's a slow fade, it's a slow fade

Be carful little ears what you hear
When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near
Be careful little lips what you say
For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astay

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white turn to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day

The journey from your mind to your hands
Its shorter then you're thinking
Be careful if you think you stand
You just might be sinking

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white turn to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
Daddies never crumble in a day
Families never crumble in a day

Oh be careful little eyes what you see
Oh be careful little eyes what you see
For the father up above is looking down in love
Oh be careful little eyes what you see

so thats the song...its soooo good!!! hope you like it...and i hope it gives you something to think about! have an awesome day! PEACE